Time with Jesus

Thank you Jesus that I am able to spend time with you. I have sent mostly popcorn prayers or small choruses to you Lord lately, but nothing from my heart. I am afraid at times to pour out my heart to you. Thank you for the opportunity that I had tonight to recognize a trap that was laid by the devil and for the abiiity to play hookey from sleep to view the rest of the DvD , In Her shoes. It had poetry in it and the ability to open one's heart to family and lovers.
Lord, I have kept my heart kind of closed lately not spending the time with the scriptures and just humming songs. I thank you Lord for the time that I spent listening to some Christian music on itunes and on the CD player. It has been real good just to talk to you to tell you of some very private parts of my life that I toss around in my head but have failed to share with Mom and Dad for fear of what they will think of me. Just normally parts of maturing through my life. I keep things on the surface with family and friends. I am afraid to get and dig deeper.
My friend, George, when I was chatting with him of my desire to be married someday, asked what are the qualities that I am looking for in a woman. I said, "she should be mature yet could be a new believer and to be godly. And she needs to be someone who can handle the limitations that I have with not being able to drive a car."
Lord, I am going to chat with a woman that I really admire at church today and hope that I have a real good conversation with her. Help me Lord to be Jesus so others are attracted to me not for what I say but for how I say it. Help me to put on your clothes and aroma and to be pleasant to be around.
Thank you Lord how you at the cross forgave those who meant you harm. How they meant it for evil, but the crucifixion you meant for good. For that tore the veil in the temple to give us direct access to God. Please help me bring the direct access to God.

Lord, I do miss my Grandma MacKinnon who died 9 years ago on February 24, 1998. When I called my parents to tell them they were amazed that I remembered the date. I was off by a year saying it was 8 years ago, but we all can add things in our head wrong. I want to have an impact on others and please help me to open myself to others more.
Thanks for this time of worship that I was able to spend in prayer, in the study of the scriptures in Romans and Hebrews, and with the time listening to praise music. Thanks for filling me with so much.
Your friend Scott

Starting from the middle

Communication can be a challenge for me these days. It is hard for me to verbalize in words what I want to say in a logical format from the beginning to the end. Even though I have never played professional sports, I can understand one anaogy a little better. It is as if an offensive teammate on a basketball team decided to make some plays without considering how his actions could affect his other players. As if he tried to initiate the plays without consulting his teammates of what he was thinking. I have to come up with a natural method that will allow me to be on the same page and plan as my boss or coworkers so they won't end in proverbial left field chasing after the ball.

A Charlie Chaplin day

The day went rather normally until about 10am with my breakfast with 4 other men from our church at the diner and then my trip to the gym and grocery store. Then off to the bus and I am standing up getting my fare card ready and I did a Charlie Chaplin routine of falling down on the rear. something that I would not want shown on Americas funniest home videos. But it is on camera through the cameras on the bus I am sure. Hopefully no one sees my antics.
Later this day, I watched classic Chaplin and what Charlie did all the time was "fall and fail to put out fires."
Better get better sleep and not be as concerned about coupons for Pastrami sandwiches and whether the frequent flier miles are still valid on the airlines I have flown on. When an idea hits my head, I can't divorce myself from it until later on. I have to solve it=my pig=headed german stubbornness that is a part of me.

Let us go siancing.

This past saturday night, I attended a valentine's day dinner dance with singles throughout Connecticut at a resort and spa. The facility had trees lined with small white lights and paths that were lit from the grouind. When I walked into the facility, the ladies were dressed in long black and red flowing dresses and the men had ties and jackets on. I enjoyed being around some new people who I did not know before.
The band that evening played christian songs and I really enjoyed one slow dance with Maryanne who held my hands I rested one of mine on her shoulder, and we danced and sang for that song. I wish it could have gone on longer-just moving slowly and us both singing songs to Jesus in worship. To be connected and in an holy embrace-if only just for a few moments. May the moment be remembered even when I at times feel far off. I can just go siancing as I used to sometimes do at work when I hear a good song on the radio at work.
I am currently enjoying on DVD the concert, Harem, sung and danced by Sarah Brightman. In one of her beautful songs, she sings who wants to live forever. I do!!!!!! With the backdrops of temptations and struggles that I face daily, I have to be reminded that this is a promise that I have received from the Holy Scriptures of God and Jesus. I WILL LIVE FOREVER!!!!!
It is a promise that I will not be void. When speaking of promises, God had made some far fetched promises that don't always at the time seem like they are going to work out. Imagine being Abraham being told that he was going to be a father of many nations-which number as the grains of sand on the shore. That is a lot of grains. I have trouble counting after a thousand the grains. Yet, to God, that is fairly easy.
NOw for the modern day of example of having God guide me through my daily life. It is a very hard thing to do since I want to control much of it as I have been discovering in my evenng bible studies in Revelation and Romans. In the areas of intimate relationships, I do not see many ladies that I could start a relationship with, especially with some of the limits that I place upon myself such as the lack of my driving and other man made obstacles. Yet, the beauty of God is that He allowed others to overcome tough obstacles by placing man within a circumstamce and drawing a curtain on the stage and letting us go thorugh the battle and challenges of life with other characters, our friends and enemies, that make us better in the process of life.
So I need to dance off my siancing shoes and do that more often. And to do it in front of a stage with God looking out at me and the special people He has and will place in my life!!!!!

Congress Street Bridge

I have lived in the city of Bridgeport for 20 years. I have never walked on or driven over the Congress Street Bridge. There has been much talk lately of how it has not joined the city together-making the connection between the East end of Bridgeport and the downtown region. It has been like a divorce between the two sides. A tale of two cities. Never a train to cross between the two sides.

At the exhibit in the Barnum museum, the exhibit, Controversaries, depicted several images of buildings and reflections on the city. On one panel, the photographer, David Ryan, took several revealing images of the decaying bridge that acts like a soldier in a saluted position with his arms raised. He is awaiting for the response of a commander to say "Hut" to move it forward and go on a march. Yet, this bridge shows much age with rust forming and a fence surrounds the bridge. The sign has the words detoured painted in white and written around the sign are graffiti marks that say detour. A red empty barrel is sitting on the pavement amidst the weeds and long grasses that are thriving on the black pavement. No movement has exited on the property except for a few random birds that fly by or go through looking for a random seed.

While looking at these photographs, I felt sad since I never knew this part of our city's history and wish I knew more of the human face to this giant.
The name of the bridge, congress, means to bridge together and be an assembly even as our United States government is. Yet, the irony and part of the controversary is how is our society going to put aside differences and establish a priority to restore funding to make this project become a reality and not to have to be part of an exhibit on controversary instead. And to bring a little commerce and community into two regions of the downtown and east ends of Bridgeport. This bridge sits over the Pequonnock River.

I know of the importance of bridges connecting places in my life. When I grew up during the summers in maine, we had to cross several bridges to get to our beloved Pratts Isle. We crossed over the Kittery Bridge where I got to yell, "Yippie, we are in Maine." Then there was the Southport Bridge that connected us to our island which was a bridge where the tenders had to close the span so the bridge could open. The Southport bridge is painted green and the span is wide. It is a metal bridge contrasted to the wooden bridge of Pratt's Island. Whenever traveling over the Southport bridge, I heard the rumbling of the tires underneath as they gripped the metal plates under the tires. I enjoyed looking at the view over the Sheepscot river as we headed into or off of Southport Island.
Even bridges get old with age with barnacles and rust forming on them but when they are tended with care and by tenders with devotion, then activity springs to life on them. It was always a good time for mom, dad and I to guess as we drove around the corner to the Southport Bridge whether it would be open or closed. There were often long waits during our summers there as the bridge had to be extended for boats to pass safely under. The Lewis family in Maine has worked on the southport Island bridge and that family devotion allows for there to be commerce and tourism. We as a society can learn a lesson or two from the Maine community and treat the Congress Street Bridge in Bridgeport that is listed as historic become part of the present and not just the past.

Let us somehow try to keep it open and give others an opportunity to experience life over a bridge and see how a rumbling of car tires over it can produce a rhythmic drum dance and get life back into two communities and commerce begun again. Not an easy thing to accomplish though but it would be well worth the effort.

BLESSINGS

Living in the Northeast can be a good time of seasons. Having passed the half-way point of the winter, we have only had the occassional dances of the snow which has come as a whisper that has floated across the sky. Yet, the few drops has just been a coating of frost that has glistened upon the sidewalks and driveways to show us that Old Man Winter has slept in Fairfield County this year. But I will take the abberration of not walking to the bus stop and work in drifts of snow as a gift and not complain.

With the high costs associated with living in this region, it does display beauty in the oceans and forests that are present. And the parks and places of refuge that line the area as well. It is a place where the rich and poor gather and can work out issues that are faced in life. And is a place where intense struggles and contrasts exist as well.

New AT THE TOWERS

Nothing really new at the towers. Just the usual routine. A usual fire alarm going off due to excess heat building up in the boiler room. Steam causes the alarm to sound. a walk down the stairs but no real follow through in an exit plan. Exit plans are important but hard to follow through these days for many people. I especially feel foolish when I start heading out at work when I hear our alarm but that is what they were meant for-to listen to, especially with the fire drills I was subjected to once a month during my public schooling from 4th to the 12th grade. And to my brave cousin who exited from the world trade towers on 09-11-01 to safety upon hearing and seeing damage from the sky.